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How to use EFT tapping when a relationship breaks up
When a relationship breaks down, there is an immediate rush of all kinds of emotions.
You vow never to look at the person again. You blame them for the breakup. You thank yourself for being rid of it. You tell yourself how bad things had gotten. And how this was long in coming.
And then you kind of decide to move on. You think of it as a shut case.
The case is shut, but is it over? After everything is said and done, pangs of regret may remain. After you think you have moved on, longing about how things could have eventually worked out, may linger. As the dust settles, a residual sadness may surface, to always remind you of the failed relationship.
Clearing these negative emotions can pave the way for more successful and desirable relationships in the future.
This EFT tapping script focuses on releasing all the sadness, longing and regret that lingers when a relationship falls apart.
This broken relationship could be with your girlfriend / boyfriend, friend, spouse, co-worker, sibling, parent, or even your hairdresser. It hurts when any precious relationship succumbs to circumstances.
EFT tapping set up phrases
Karate chop
Even though it feels like I will never really get over this relationship, despite all the reasons that brought it to an end, I want to start feeling better, slowly, but surely.
Even though I feel sad and powerless because of all the missed possibilities this relationship could have grown into, I’m open to looking at it from a peaceful and empowered vantage point.
Even though I still miss being in the relationship, and I’m holding on to a remote hope that actually just ties me down, I’m open to releasing this need to hold on to wreckage. It looks hard, but I am willing to adopt it in my thinking in the gentlest way possible.
EFT tapping round 1
Eyebrow I miss how things were.
Side of the eye It didn’t have to end this way.
Under the eye Just like that.
Under the nose I wish it had worked out.
Chin Thinking that it wasn’t meant to work isn’t any solace.
Collar bone I don’t think I can get over it.
Under the arm I’m not a robot that can add and delete relationships.
Top of the head I still cannot believe what happened.
EFT tapping round 2
Eyebrow My heart feels heavy with grief and shock.
Side of the eye It hurts to think that I’m still suffering
Under the eye when the other person has likely moved on.
Under the nose I hate it that I’m so emotional about it.
Chin I’m still holding on to hope that things will turn around.
Collar bone I tried hard to make it work.
Under the arm Along with the relationship, I lost all the wonderful possibilities of what could have been.
Top of the head This emptiness is chipping away at me.
EFT tapping round 3
Eyebrow I wish the relationship had grown despite all the missing links,
Side of the eye instead of coming to a dead end.
Under the eye Why couldn’t we see past the setbacks?
Under the nose Things looked promising.
Chin Maybe underneath all my happiness,
Collar bone part of me felt that it was too good to be true.
Under the arm At some level, I was filled with fear
Top of the head that it would slip out of my hands.
EFT tapping round 4
Eyebrow Maybe we were simply not suited for each other.
Side of the eye Maybe I was suspicious of where it was headed,
Under the eye instead of enjoying it for what it was, in the moment.
Under the nose Maybe I got lost in my frenzy to make things work.
Chin In the process, I missed grave signs of impending doom.
Collar bone Maybe I kept wanting to make it work,
Under the arm even when the cracks in the wall were there for everyone to see.
Top of the head Whatever it was, I’m sad it didn’t work out.
EFT tapping round 5
Eyebrow I tried hard, I appreciated the good things.
Side of the eye And yet it had to end.
Under the eye My heart longs for that easy confidence I had
Under the nose that things would never fall apart.
Chin Even though I understand all the umpteen reasons
Collar bone why things didn’t work out, I still wish they had worked out.
Under the arm We just couldn’t change each other.
Top of the head Or accept us just as we were.
EFT tapping round 6
Eyebrow We really cannot change others. Not forever.
Side of the eye Maybe I expected too much out of them.
Under the eye That they were not capable of, or ready for.
Under the nose I feel inadequate that I couldn’t bring out the best in them.
Chin I feel disappointed for making a wrong choice.
Collar bone It felt so good to think that my search was over.
Under the arm But the truth is, nothing lasts forever.
Top of the head Even with a lot of repairs.
EFT tapping round 7
Eyebrow And now this broken relationship has become
Side of the eye a club I’m holding over my head.
Under the eye How long will I keep feeling bad?
Under the nose I want to make peace with it, and move on.
Chin It is not so much about coming to terms with it
Collar bone as it is about freeing myself.
Under the arm Free of this longing for what COULD have been.
Top of the head How about I focus on what CAN be?
EFT tapping round 8
Eyebrow I’m understanding that it is okay,
Side of the eye not all relationships are meant to last forever.
Under the eye I choose to make the best of them anyway.
Under the nose I choose to measure my relationships by their quality, not their duration.
Chin Releasing this fear of letting go of people.
Collar bone Releasing this desperate attachment to people I connect with.
Under the arm I choose to keep all the good I receive from them.
Top of the head I’m becoming comfortable with the idea of letting go what no longer serves me.
EFT tapping round 9
Eyebrow Releasing this need to salvage what is not there anymore.
Side of the eye I’m making space for all the wonderful people I can connect with.
Under the eye Releasing this heaviness of grief. Breathing deeply.
Under the nose Releasing this guilt too. Relaxing my shoulders.
Chin I choose to forgive myself for what happened.
Collar bone I choose to forgive others who were involved.
Under the arm I choose to let them be what they want to be,
Top of the head while freeing myself to be what I will be.
EFT tapping round 10
Eyebrow I’m keeping the good memories, and letting all this sadness go.
Side of the eye Releasing this need to arm twist my relationships in the direction I want them to go.
Under the eye I choose to let my relationships flow, easily and comfortably.
Under the nose I’m feeling good about myself.
Chin I’m feeling worthy of valuable relationships.
Collar bone I’m ready with open arms.
Under the arm For new and exciting relationships to come my way.
Top of the head I’m calm and confident and free.
See how you feel after a round of this tapping. You could repeat tapping through it once again if you find any negative charge still remaining.
Tapping through this script may bring up related aspects of the breakup, such as specific incidents leading up to it. With bigger emotions neutralized with this tapping script, you may find it easier to tap on the remaining ones.
Also check out my compilation of EFT tapping videos for a relationship break-up.
If you are feeling angry about the breakup, you may also find this EFT tapping when you are feeling angry useful. Here are some related EFT scripts that you might want to tap through as well:
EFT tapping when you are feeling lonely.
EFT tapping around people who simply don’t care about you.
EFT tapping when you are feeling hurt by what someone said.
I'm an Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) Tapping enthusiast and a computer geek. My done-for-you programs take the difficulty out of using Tapping and make it easy for everyone to benefit from this powerful, life-changing technique.
Thank you so much for posting this tool. I was doing good and then after 1 month my ex contacted me with beautiful words and I felt like I went right back to square one. I have been feeling really possessed by my negative emotions in the past few days, what it could have been and this allowed me to release my feelings. I am feeling so much better and relaxed, at peace. thank you so much!
Neloch, I’m very pleased to know this tapping brought you relief. Yes, I see what you mean – we get stuck in “what could have been” and hold on to hope which sometimes may not be the best thing for us. Most of the tapping scripts come from reader requests, so let me know whenever you’d like to see something not already covered here.
Great! I couldn’t release the pain, this worked. Thank you.
I’d like to get some EFT scripts on releasing regret and guilt in a case when I first felt we had met the love of my life, but later broke up with them. (This is because I felt controlled, my emotions not taken care of, that I had to take care of him instead, etc.) Also an EFT script on trusting myself, because I cannot articulate my gut feeling and my brain cannot accept/process them but keeps thinking about it. My brain needs a rationale for breaking up. Thank you so much!
I feel like you wrote exactly how I feel about myself and my marriage break up xx
I’m glad the tapping script resonated with you, Margaret. Do continue to tap on any residual feelings/memories that may come up. Love and blessings, Sonal
this relationship tap helps me so much. It helped straight away when i broke off a relationship. to a person i considered to be a son. i thought i could not breathe without him. now im fine. im now using for another person who i also considered to be a son. All he does however is use me for money. and is vile and obnoxious when he doesnt get it. im releasing this person from my life. he is just not worth my time and effort. i am looking after myself.
Thank you so, so much for this gift xx
After just one round of this script, I am feeling some relief from the pain of a relationship ending a month and a half ago. I continue to think about why he didn’t find me worth the effort to fight for our relationship. It is in my mind almost constantly. I also found out that the man I had been with for a year was likely seeing someone else during the end of our relationship. How do I let go of this feeling of worthlessness and the pain of betrayal?
Hi Laverne,
I’m glad you found the script useful. When we feel betrayed in a relationship, it’s always a good idea to clear those feelings (using Tapping). Otherwise those feelings can stay with us and cause difficulty trusting the partner in a future relationship. If I may suggest, I’d have you look at this program called Release the Pain of Betrayal https://tap-easy.com/betrayal-relationship-trusting-eft-video/. See if it resonates with you. I believe this could be the next step in your healing. I realize that it is not a free version, but perhaps check it out anyway and see. Love and blessings, Sonal